Difference

"Hi Rajesh, I have one question", said I as soon as I saw Rajesh is having some leisure time.
"Yes what is it?"

"I wanted to ask the question since two days and was trying to find the right time to do that."
"Now is the right time you can say, and ask now, will you?” Rajesh smiled while uttering these words.

"You apologized to Madhav about that joke incidence, you remember?"
"Yes I do"
"Do you really feel you have done so wrong by cutting a joke for Madhav that you had to apologize?"
"Let me think, I just did that without much thinking as I felt it should be done at that moment."
"Now when I think I can say yes, Madhav approached me and told me that he felt offended when I cracked one joke for him.", Rajesh paused and started again;

"Even if the joke was un-intentional still it caught Madhav's attention and he felt offended. See this time Madhav approached me instead of complaining to any one else. I appreciated his act and I apologized."

"Yes Rajesh but the question is do you really think that was necessary? You could have explained him that the joke was just for humor and was nothing to do with making Madhav un-happy"

"See, I must agree that I still don’t feel the joke was out of place but what I also agree that Madhav was hurt. This is not the issue of what is correct or what is wrong. When I saw Madhav was hurt it is my consideration about Madhav's feelings that I felt I must say sorry."

"The root of the act lies in understanding the feelings other person is having about a particular incidence."

"Oh, so you mean the act of apologizing was just to make Madhav happy?"

"No my dear, it is about respecting co-worker's feelings. It is about respecting the difference of opinion. I have my opinions but I should also respect opinions of my co-workers which may be poles apart from mine. And when I felt that my act made my friend un-happy I respected his feelings, accepted that It was me whose act made him un-happy and then it was spontaneous that I apologized through my heart."

"Got it Rajesh and yes you are true in saying that" said I.

Tushar Joshi, Nagpur

(Image courtesy Sarah)

Discussion

Things were not working right. Something was wrong. I was having this feeling since many days. All my colleagues seemed to cope up with the work pressure and deadlines. Somehow I was restless.

Was it I who was only restless? What to do now? Who to contact? Will there be anyone who can understand my situation and give some solution?

"Calm down Calm down Sameer!” I said to myself. "First try to know the real problem" I repeated the words I have heard in some movie, where the teacher trains her students to overcome hurdles.
Sometimes movies also help you this way, they teach things.

"And what is your real problem Sameer? Can you write down the most important three issues that are disturbing you currently", I again talked to me.
"Yes why not", said I; internally knowing that I wasn’t having the slightest clue of what I was about to say next. There wasn't any thought yet in my mind about the most important issues before now. But this self dialog was helping, I thought, and again got engaged in the dialog.

"You see I work so hard but the work given to me is so much that I cannot complete it in the given time frame. What ever I do it never gets appreciation, and I am always behind the schedule."
"So is it the time management problem? or work management problem?", my second mind asked me.
"No it is the appreciation problem, I feel useless if no one appreciates what I have done."
"Oh, so you got the issue nailed now," said my second mind and continued, "I will rephrase the problem now and it is you have no problem to work late and work hard, and only you want is people should note what you are doing and should appreciate the work done in time."
"Exactly! You said it"

"Now let us try to find a solution to this issue", said my second mind. "Yes yes", I responded eagerly and "how to do that?" was my obvious question.

"Well I don’t know Sameer", said my second mind; "but I must find one for you as I am the creative part of your existence."

"Hey you see that calendar?” asked my mind.
"Where oh on the right wall yes", said I
"And it says bhiu nakos mii tujhyaa paathishii aahe, means don’t be afraid I am always with you"
"So..."
"It gives me one idea, see we work for someone. The output of our work, the deliverables is property of our company. So if there is any problem we should reach above our position to convey the problems to them who own these deliverables."

"Hey do you really think this can solve the issue? And not aggravate it, look I don’t want to be cornered as a nagger or an in-competent employee", said I with force.

"You may be right but what I think is if all the ways are exhausted and you have left with no option, there is a option to surrender to the supreme authority, and for us the supreme authority in work are our superiors."
"I agree to this, but how to proceed"
"Plan a meeting with the management and raise the concern"
"Will that help?"
"It may or may not but it will provide us a feeling that we have done our job of telling them at the right time"
"And what should I tell them"
"All the things you told me, all the issues and the exact thing what we pointed out some minutes ago".

"Hey you know what, I am feeling good now. Talking to you was great Sameer!"
"No problem yaar after all I am your second mind, and the creative one, remember!"

"You know", I said, "I feel fresh after all this thoughts. I can work with energy again now. The problem seems to have vanished. I no longer feel dejected. But yes I will keep the solution you suggested in mind. Whenever there will be the time when I am left with no other option I will follow the “surrender to the supreme power” way what you told."
"No problem yaar, but do you agree that problem should not persist. If there is something haunting you in the back of your mind then it affects the work and the work is the only criteria to prove your existence."
"Yes I agree to that"

"So shall we celebrate with coffee now?” asked my second mind. "Yes by all means", I nodded my face marching towards the pantry to have a cup of coffee.

Tushar Joshi, Nagpur

(Image courtesy Vanessa)

Energy Dose

"Hello Sushant", said Vikram a colleague working with me in my office.

We were rising up. We were in an elevator. Usually we meet only in places like this. The elevator, the down stairs cafeteria, or the terrace smoking club.

We usually share things like project schedules and trivia.

"Hey, I was there in the meeting when you presented the proposal. That was awesome man. I really liked it", said Vikram.

"What to say now", Sushant was thinking, “Thanks Vikram, do you really think I did well?"

"Well! I said awesome man. It was really effective and the people seem to listen to you with full concentration"

Vikram stepped out as the elevator stopped at fourth floor. The door closed again and now I was again rising towards my work place, the sixth floor.

I was smiling. This was a good start of the day. It really feels good when somebody appreciates your actions and behavior. Actually this was just a small gesture Vikram showed in the elevator. I sensed that Vikram was honest in saying what he said and my mood became great.

I know one should not get carried away by praise, appreciation or flattery, but some drops of honest appreciation always make your life energetic. Vikram did that for me this morning.

I also made up my mind to express honest appreciation for my colleagues whenever possible as I now know these little words make a lot of difference in their daily routine life.

Tushar Joshi, Nagpur

Gift Crazy

It was birthday time again. When there is a up-coming birthday of your dear one it usually become birthday season. You start preparations like thinking about the possible gift. A gift having some shock value, some surprise, some personal touch.

He was thinking of giving something unique to her. Something which may not be a gift in true conventional sense. Something which will make her appreciate his feelings towards her.

What can be the gift which will make her smile? Something which will make her feel important. Something which will tell her that he really thought for her. Something which may be silly, rather it should be silly enough to amaze her.

He was enough crazy, to figure out the gift and he did figured out. That day he purchased a plain diary. The birthday was after 15 days so he had 15 days to work on the gift. He started writing in the diary for her. He kept on writing. While writing for her he got time to think about her. To remember her with cause was a great pleasure for him.

The day arrived. She came to his house. He was eagerly waiting for this moment. He wished her happy birthday. He was anxious about what she will say, after he presents the gift to her. Will she be mad? Will she be amazed? Lots of questions were crossing his mind.

“Come I have a gift for you”, he said to her.
“Birthday Gift, where is it, I cant wait” she responded.

Then he took out the well wrapped diary and presented her in style.
“Happy Birthday to you Seema! This is just a simple gift for you.”

She opened the wrapper slowly in her style. She folder the wrapper and kept it with caution into her purse. Yes, she has a habit of keeping even the wrappers of my gifts. Then she opened the diary. The diary was written from cover to cover no line left blank.

All the pages of the diary were filled with just one sentence. “I love you Seema”. She browsed the pages seeing all over there was just one sentence written.

She looked at him. “Thank you”, said she with tears in her eyes. She held his hand in her hand and said
“Very much like you, just your style.”

She said nothing more. The tear drops in her eyes was the real treasure he cherished for his life.

Tushar Joshi, Nagpur

(Image courtesy dee m)